Proverbs 17 : 17 : A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.
. There is a likelihood that you married your friend and you may not have been friends before you decided to get married. However, it’s been said that the best and strongest of marriages are built on the foundation of friendship and I agree. I have watched different marriages over the years and I love how those who are good friends and continue to do so, have beautiful marriages. Here are ways to build friendship with your spouse whether you have been friends or not.
1. If you are not friends, you can cultivate friendship. You can be intentional about starting something new. Imagine that you are meeting this girl or guy for the first time and you want to make him or her your friend. You would sincerely love to know them, and that means you make efforts to talk often, about any and everything. You also look out for them as often as possible because they soon become special to you.
2. Protect and preserve your friendship : Don’t just love your spouse, like him or her.
a. Make him/her feel special : Don’t allow familiarity to set in. It does not matter how long you have been married for, make sure he or she remains a priority and let them know this. Even when you have children, still ensure that your spouse feels special.
b. Let them be privy to certain information you can’t share with others. Share secrets. This makes your spouse feel very important.
c. Desire and enjoy each other’s company : If there’s been anyone contending with that space (meaning you prefer to be with them rather than your spouse), you need to immediately replace them with your spouse. The more you allow someone or something else to take the place of your spouse, the wider the gap between you and the less intimate you become.
d. Spend time talking: The more time you spend talking, the closer you will get. Ask questions like: How are you? How did your day go? Would you like to talk about anything? My husband and I call to check on each other during the day, that way, we really bond.
e. Do life together: Take decisions together, do little things together as much as work and time would permit. Fight for it, schedule it.
f. Sleep on the same bed: Don’t allow kids to separate you. Some seasons, such as when a woman has just had a baby may be very sensitive and when not well taken care of, begin to create gaps between a couple.
g. Play together: Find out what you each love to do, and make an effort to enjoy that time with your spouse. Watch movies, take a stroll, play games, etc. Schedule vacations. It’s an excellent way to bond as a couple. We have tried to get away just by ourselves every year and it’s one of the most beautiful things we do in our union.
h. Grow together: Spiritually, financially, in your careers, socially etc. it’s important that you don’t grow apart as you grow older. It’s a beautiful thing to see your spouse do just as well as you are.
i. Pray together: You are a mighty force. The more you pray together, the stronger the bond. The more beautiful your union.
j. Serve God together: This is certainly one way of enjoying and building friendship in this union. Either at your local assembly or working on a specific assignment together. It brings you so much joy and fulfillment together.
